Let It Go
by Skye Evergreene
Summary: All Sadie ever wanted was a normal family, after it was ripped away from her years ago. But when L suspects her of being Kira, her dream becomes hopeless, but perhaps that is not what she wanted all along. OCxL/Light
1. Prolouge

**Hola! So, this is my Death note Fanfic! Please read and review, I'm going to post chapter 1 right after this, sorry it's so short, I just thought it was necessary for it to be separate :)**

_Dark, cold air brushed against the girl's frail body, whipping her black hair this way and that. The rain pattered on her face as she looked up at the sky, her expression blank. She could hear the voices of the men coming for her in a distance, and yet she did not feel compelled to run away. The dark figures came closer, even closer now until they were right up to her. The biggest of the group had a gun; he was pointing it at her. Oh god, they really got her this time. She saw the man slowly pull the trigger, and the bang that came slowly afterwards signified her upcoming, inevitable death. She felt pain almost instantly afterwards. She fell to the ground. Oh god, they really got her. They did it. _

_They got me._


	2. Chapt 1

**So this is Chapter 1! Please Read and Review! :)**

* * *

Sadie's eyes shot open, and her blue eyes met another's black.

"Good morning, Near," she grumbled, ruffling his pure white hair," What are you doing in here?"

"You were having a nightmare. I woke you up."

Sadie grinned and scooped him up in her arms, trudging down the hall.

"Thanks, Near! Might as well start the day now that we're both awake. What do you want for breakfast?"

The silence that followed only made Sadie grin wider. Near did not talk much, so getting him to talk was a challenge she was willing to endure.

Making her way down Wammy's House to the kitchen, she noticed the clock read 4:30 a.m. She sighed. It seemed her inability to sleep only was getting worse as each night passed by. She glanced towards a doorway leading to an office and noticed a glowing light illuminating the small room.

"Not again," Sadie mumbled as she put Near down on a stool and stomped toward the doorway.

She peered in to notice Matt with his head crouched down over one of his little game consoles.

"Matt!" Sadie yelled, making Matt jump in his seat in surprise, his red goggles flying off his face. Before he could begin protesting, she grabbed his game from him and forced him up the stairs.

"But Sadie! I was just about to save Princess Peach!"

"Yea yea, you can save fruit royalty after you sleep until at least ten," she grumbled, all but dragging him through the hallway,

Sadie walked into Matt's room with him in tow. After getting him in bed, she noticed that Mello, Matt's roommate, was missing.

"Just go to bed Matt. See ya later," she said quietly, already thinking about where Mello could possibly be. She decided that leaving him be would be the best option. He was only a few years younger than her, so he could probably handle himself. By the time that she made her way back downstairs, the ten-seat dining room table right in front of the kitchen was nearly full. Near sat at the end of the table, playing with toys that seemed to magically appear in his hands.

To his right sat Felicia, a small girl with big brown eyes, and an even bigger heart. After her were the triplets, all boys, all equally as troublesome, and all with fire red hair and freckles seeming to cover their entire bodies. There names were Toby, Tyler, and Tim, and they were all throwing little contraptions they made at each other and any other poor soul to get close enough to them.

Era, a dark skinned boy with the mind of an erratic poet, was scribbling some odd writing down on his notebook. He always wore his hoodie up over his face, so the others could not see the small twitch he always got by being constantly surrounded by people. Next to him sat the two inseparable girls, Sky and Christa. It was obvious from the start these two were not related though, for they were exact opposites. While Sky had blonde hair and green eyes, Christa had pure black hair and equally as dark eyes. Sky could solve trigonometry with her eyes closed, and Christa could recite the Declaration of Independence without a single hesitation. And yet, despite their differences, one couldn't seem to do anything without the other.

Sadie looked around the room, a smirk on her face, and her "nightmare" nearly forgotten.

"Alright, who's hungry?"

* * *

**What did you think? :) So this is go like my Dragon Age 2 Fanfiction, "Remember Tomorrow". I have a lot already done, but I will not continue to write after that point if no one is reviewing. I don't mean to sound conceited, but I don't really want to publish this if no one is reading it, haha :) So please R&R!**


	3. Chapt 2

**Happy New Year everyone! Thank you SO much Gaaralover2247, I Know YOUP, and BB for reviewing, it means the WORLD to me. :) Also, to answer BB's question possibly, i don't see why not, I'll see how I can incorporate him :). Just a heads up this next chapter is pretty sudden and quick, just bear with me hah. :)**

* * *

Sadie decided after finally getting everyone settled the first order of business was to find out where Mello was. Everyone said that ever since some guy named "L" left, Mello changed, and apparently not for the better. He was slowly becoming more and more depressed due to his inability to be a more sufficient replacement for L than Near. He always thought of L as a father figure, and with him gone, his inability to rise up to the challenge has deeply scarred him. Mello is truly terrified that he might be stuck in Wammy's House for his whole life.

Sadie rolled up the sleeves of her worn out fleece and started toward the attic, the one place that Mello claimed his and his only. Suddenly, Felicia grabbed Sadie's arm, and the little girl stared at her with a pleading gaze. Felicia, like Near, didn't talk much, so Sadie was used to deciphering exactly what Felicia was trying to express.

Sadie kissed Felicia's forehead and pushed her blonde hair behind her ear, slowly pushing Felicia's hand off of her own.

"I'll be right back Felicia! Stop worrying about me and eat your pancake!" Sadie laughed, which was rewarded with the tiniest of smiles from the petite girl in front of her. Satisfied, Sadie continued on her way to the attic.

After struggling to remain silent as to not wake Matt from his slumber, Sadie managed to make it all the way to the small door on the ceiling in the closet. Right before she opened the door though, she heard a small click coming from inside the cramped room.

Sadie froze.

She _knew_ that sound.

It was a gun. It _had_ to be a gun. Sadie took a deep breath, in and out, before debating whether or not she should go in the room alone. But no, she didn't have a choice really. What if someone was hurting Mello? What if Mello was hurting _himself_? With a small grunt, Sadie pushed down her fears and opened the small door.

"Mello? What's going on in here?" She asked, after noticing the blonde boy all alone in the room, his back to her. She also saw he was holding something in his hands, and deduced that it had to be the gun she heard earlier.

Mello nearly jumped out of his skin as he spun around to face Sadie, pushing the gun behind his back.

"What are you doing here? Don't you have to go play mom for all of the little kiddies?" Mello spat out, standing to face Sadie.

Instead of feeling fear from Mello's intimidating posture, she only felt a pang of sadness. _Dear god, he's growing already_ she thought. He was already much taller than her, and suddenly the extremity of the situation she was in hit her. Sadie swallowed her fear though, and replaced it with a soft smile.

"C'mon Mello, don't be like that. Let's go downstairs. I made you chocolate chip pancakes, I know their your favorite," Sadie held out her hand, her eyes flashing to the tip of the gun hanging from behind his back. Mello saw where her eyes roamed to, and she could see a small expression of fear flash across his face, but it was quickly replaced by anger. Soon, his face was turning multiple shades of red, and Sadie decided she needed to do something, and _soon_.

"Mello-" Sadie started, but before she could even get another word out, a bang sounded throughout the room, echoing off of the small room's walls.

The ringing sound of the shot rang in Sadie's ears as she struggled to absorb the impact of the bullet. _He shot me. He actually just shot me._

The boy felt a stab of guilt fill him once the ringing ceased, and soon his expression was one of horror and he dropped the gun and ran to Sadie.

"Sadie! I'm so sorry! I don't know what I was thinking! I'm such a monster that I-"  
Suddenly Sadie fell to the ground, her face expressionless. Mello quickly ran out of the room shouting for help.

Sadie frowned in a certain annoyance as she watched the dark spots grow larger and larger around her vision. She could feel the pain fade, and soon, an unwelcome slumber wrapped her in comforting arms.

* * *

**:O! I know, its crazy, but I needed Mello to be really angsty in this in order for it all to play out right :) R&R please! **


	4. Chapt 3

**Wow! It has been a REALLY long time since I've been on here, and for that I apologize! I just finished my midterms, so I will certainly be able to keep a steady every other day update from now on :). Also, once again, thank you SOO much Gaaralover2247 for reviewing! it really means the world!**

* * *

Sadie awoke with a start, nearly falling off of the bed she had been placed in three days prior. She spun her head in all directions, trying to understand where she was. Rapidly, everything was splitting into two's and three's…Sadie rubbed her temples slowly, and soon enough everything turned back to normal. She saw she was in her, Felicia, and Christa's room, in her own bed. Sadie's eyebrows pushed together in confusion. The last thing she remembered…

Mello…

Mello _shot_ her.

Suddenly she felt something drip down from her forehead, slowly going down the bridge of her nose until it reached the tip. She looked at it cross-eyed as saw it was none other than blood creeping down from the newly discovered bandage on her head.

"Irritating…" She mumbled as she gazed around looking for something to wipe it off with. Coming up with nothing, she decided getting up and asking somebody for help wouldn't bite. And maybe they could explain why she closed her eyes for two seconds and she magically appeared in her bed, feeling perfectly fine.

Sadie stood u quickly, only to fall flat on her face once again. She rolled her eyes at the pathetic body she seemed to be currently trapped in. She grunted and forced herself to stand up once again, deciding to just suck it up. _You're not dying_ she told herself_ you just need a goddamn napkin_.

She made her way down the eerily quiet orphanage to the kitchen where she was sure someone would be able to help her.

And they were. Everyone, even Watari, was there, but none of them seemed like the kids they were just that morning when Sadie was making breakfast. All of them looked somber, especially Near, and not a single person was talking. Just the mere sight of these usually joyful children with their heads hung low made Sadie's heart thump loudly.

Unfortunately, her attempt at not interrupting whatever it was they were doing was futile, for she instantly slipped on some odd thing on the ground and face-planted into the doorway. There was a pause, where every single head whipped around to face the source of the sound, only to hear a small groan coming from the heap on the floor. In that moment, the shock vibrated through the room, and not a single person could break the tension.

Feeling a tad guilty about interrupting everyone, Sadie light heartedly mumbled something about "people need to clean up their stuff around here" and turned to face her audience.

"Does anyone have a napkin?"

"Sadie! You're okay!" Everyone was all yelling at once and soon they completely swarmed the poor girl, grabbing onto her as if to make sure she was actually alive.

Soon Watari silenced all of them and stepped through to wipe the blood off of Sadie's face.

"Thanks Watari," Sadie smiled, looking around at everybody with a confused expression. She never saw them _that_ happy to see her…

"Sadie…do you remember what happened at all?" Watari asked, concern sketching his features. The girl was never one to refrain from speaking her mind, but one look at Mello's devastated face and she knew that one white lie wouldn't hurt anyone.

"Well, no. I remember walking up the stairs to get Mello and Matt and then…nothing." She said quietly, sitting cross-legged on the floor.

Watari soon became aware of their little audience, and ushered Sadie into his own private office, ignoring the whining of the other children as he slowly closed the door and offered Sadie a seat.

"Sadie…tell me. Do you know how long you were unconscious?"

"Well," Sadie started, resting her head on her hands as she sat cross legged on the chair," I was making breakfast for the kids this morning and then-"

"Sadie," Watari interrupted her and placed a hand on her shoulder, looking at her straight in the eyes," You made breakfast for the other orphans three days ago."

Shocked, Sadie covered her face with her hands, thinking. She felt a sharp pain on her head and decided to interrupt the tension-filled silence.

"Hey, Watari…" Sadie stared, wincing as she rubbed her bandage covered forehead," how come my head is bandaged? Because clearly I was shot in the leg, not the head, or I would not be here right now."

Watari laughed nervously at the memory," Ah, well, after Mello came to get us to help you, we knew we needed to get you to the infirmary. Unfortunately, none of us are particularly athletic, so one of us slipped and…eh, well…" Watari sighed and looked up at Sadie, clearly nervous and agitated," you took a small tumble down the stairs. Luckily the only real damage you took was to the head…" Watari trailed off, and soon a silence filled the room.

Sadie stared at Watari, her hand frozen on her bandage, and blinked at the fatherly figure in front of her.

A grin settled in her features, and soon she was laughing hysterically at the look on Watari's face.

"Watari honestly!" Sadie said in-between fits of laughter," You worry way too much!"

Watari stared at the petite girl in front of him, and soon a gentle smile graced his features. After Sadie calmed down, she looked down at her hands, a big smile plastered on her face.

"Yah know, Watari," Sadie said quietly after some time," I feel so lucky to be able to stay in this house."

Watari's eyes widened in shock. Not one person had ever called themselves lucky to be in an orphanage such as this, and certainly not someone who just experience a coma for three days. Then suddenly, like a shot going straight through his heart, he remembered the real reason for him having her in his office that day.

"Actually Sadie," he started," I needed to talk to you three days ago about something," He wiped his brow, which had suddenly shined with sweat, "It's extremely important."

* * *

**Cliffhanger! hah :) Hope you liked it, and please R&R!**


	5. Chapt 4

**Long chapter today, with a big twist at the end :) Also, to answer MyBell31795...well...I can't. But I can promise that the answer will reveal itself if not in this chapter then in ones coming up. Enjoy!**

* * *

Sadie looked up at him, her head once again resting on her hands, her eyes staring into his with a look of curiosity on them.

"What's wrong, Watari?"

Watari shook his head and gulped, once again amazed at how easily she deciphered his expression.

"Well Sadie, as you know this is not any ordinary orphanage. It is specially designed for the highly intelligent children who seek-"

"Watari." The girl said, looking up at him, wearing a small and sad smile," I am aware that I am most certainly not of high intelligence. If you are meaning to say I can no longer stay here than of course I will move out immediately and-"

Watari grabbed Sadie's shoulders and shook her slightly, a panicked look on his face.

"Sadie, are you completely insane? Do you know what these children's lives were like without you?" There was a moment of silence before Watari backed up, rubbing his temples and sighing," The reason I'm saying this is because L has requested that you take an intelligence exam, so that he can assess whether or not you can stay here."

Sadie gazed around the small room as Watari spoke to her. It was cramped, for sure, and the small desk filled with papers was a complete mess. Some of the paint on the walls was chipping off, and the tan color peeled away to show a much more appealing light blue one. Why Watari ever repainted it was beyond-

"Sadie? Are you even listening to me?" Watari asked, his voice slightly strained as he watched the girl whip her head in his direction.

"Huh? Yeah, yeah of course Watari. Go on," Sadie grumbled, rubbing the back of her neck, her cheeks red from embarrassment.

The old man sighed and continued, "But, if you do not want to take the test that L has designed, you are more than welcome to reject his request. I was simply saying that I could easily send L a letter explaining why you will not be taking the test. There is no way I would let go of you that easily, Sadie."

Another silence filled the air as Sadie assessed her current situation. She smirked a bit, and looked out the small window. _Finally, this was her chance._

"Actually Watari, if you don't mind, could you send a letter to L and tell him I'm taking whatever exam he wishes for me to take?"

Watari stepped back in shock, and looked at her sternly.

"Now Sadie, don't be ridiculous! It would be reckless and stupid for you to take such an unnecessary risk like that! L's test is specially programed and very difficult! Sadie, you have acted like a mother figure for these children for years now, how would they feel if you left?"

Sadie only grimaced, and slouched in the chair, still sitting cross-legged, and folded her arms over her chest.

"See, that's just it Watari! I am not really a member of this orphanage, am I? I'm more of a bloody caretaker, at best! And easily replaceable nanny! I've been feeling terribly about staying here for as long as I have. You and I both know perfectly well that the only reason I am still here is because I had taken care of Near before you found us. That small child is the only reason really I am allowed to stay here So of course I want to prove that I deserve to be here! Right now I'm just dead weight. I need to show everyone I can be important to the Wammy house."

Watari sat down in the chair across from Sadie, rubbing his temples as she left.

"I'll be back around noon tomorrow to take the test if you don't mind," she said, pausing only to pat his shoulder reassuringly," I'll be fine Watari," she said leaning against the door way out of the office," I always am."

Watari buried his head into his hands, trying his best not to yell after her. She didn't understand, did she? She didn't get just how much she was needed around here. She became the best mother each of these children could have asked for at the young age of 20, and she still thinks she needs to prove her worth?

The elder peered through his now shaking hands at the open computer of to the side.

"L…" Watari said, gazing at the computer with a pleading gaze.

"I will be sending the test over to you as soon as possible Watari," a voice from the computer screen replied, before a beep went off, signaling that L had ended the transmission.

And with that, Watari was left alone to pull his "gentle grandfather" face on and act as if nothing were wrong.

The next day, Sadie knocked on the door to Watari's office with determination in her eyes. She had already made sure that none of the children were paying attention to what she was doing. She didn't want them to get upset over the chance she would be leaving shortly.

Sadie paused for a while, debating whether or not to go through with all of this. She closed her eyes, exhaling silently. That morning had all been a blur for her; she was so preoccupied with what was to come. The girl opened her eyes, and tugged her spikey black hair into a ponytail behind her. Suddenly, her peripheral vision caught sight of blond hair to her right.

It was Mello. He was simply standing there, staring at her with those sharp eyes of his. There was a moment where they just looked at each other, not really knowing what to say.

Sadie look away, sighing, and slowly opened the door.

Watari silently guided Sadie to the desk that had previously been covered in papers. Sadie smiled when she noticed the desk was completely clean, and piles of papers were just thrown on both sides of it, making room for the open laptop. Watari was never the type to tidy after himself, Sadie thought with a chuckle. She plopped down, sitting cross-legged on a chair in front of the sleek black laptop. After Sadie took her seat, Watari began to explain how the exam would work.

"In front of you sits the computer that L has personally added the questions needed for your…assessment," Watari mumbled the last part, still clearly upset about Sadie's predicament," The audio will begin playing, and each scenario will be told to you. After that you have about 5 minutes to come up with the answer. Are you sure you're up for this Sadie?"

But Sadie was hardly listening. She kept staring at the picture of an L in front of her, as if at any moment it would begin to ask her questions. She wasn't about to fail simply because she wasn't paying attention.

"Hmm? Yea Watari, I think I got it, thanks. So how come this L guy's insignia's on the computer? Did he come up with the questions?"

"Well, yes, one could say that." Watari frowned at the computer. He knew that the audio was not simply going to start playing, and that in fact L was right on the other side of the computer, staring right back at Sadie, and he would be he one asking her the questions directly.

Suddenly a beeping noise sounded off, and L's voice could be heard through the speakers of the computer.

"Welcome to the grade A high intelligence assessment exam. Each question will be spoken to you. If you do not know the answer, say the word "skip"."

There was a slight pause, but soon the audio picked up again.

"We will start with the common sense part of this test. Question one: If three cats catch three mice in three minutes, how many cats would be needed to catch 100 mice in 100 minutes?"

Sadie smiled to herself. This was an easy one!

"Still three cats." Sadie stated, and shifted so she was resting her head on her hands, still cross-legged. She always felt more comfortable that way.

There was another pause followed by another question from the audio.

"What is your reasoning behind that answer?"

"Well, each of the cats are catching the mice at a rate of one mouse per minute, so if they are given 100 minutes, they will catch 100 mice."

And the test dragged on like that. Although occasionally Sadie felt she did not have the right answer, she never said the word skip. Even if she had to come up with the most ridiculous ideas. The very last question almost made her skip, but she decided to stick with it anyway.

"Last question, question 100: Dave and Brad, two popular politicians, met at a club to discuss the overthrow of their party leader. They each ordered vodka on the rocks. Brad downed his and ordered another. He then drank his second in a gulp and decided to wait before he ordered a third. Meanwhile, Dave, who was sipping his drink, suddenly fell forward dead. Both men were setup for an assassination. Why did Dave die and Brad live?"

Sadie paused, and leaned back in the chair, deep in thought. It didn't seem to make sense to her. Wouldn't they both die? Suddenly, she slapped herself on the forehead and yelled out," I am such an idiot sometimes! The poison was in the ice! Dave drank it slow enough for the ice to melt and the poison to get into the drink!"

"You have completed your exam. By this time tomorrow your results will be in."  
And with that, the monitor shut off, and Sadie slouched in her chair, that sad smile teasing her lips once again.

"Well, I should get packed, just in case."

She sauntered out of the room with a quietness about that was extremely rare to see her in. Watari's fists clenched as he awaited the results to come in. He knew it would only take L minutes to get the results in, and he was curious to know why the man didn't just have Sadie wait the short period of time. But he did know one thing.

L couldn't be up to any good.

"Watari?" a voice came from the computer, making Watari jump and run over to the computer.

"Well L? How did she do?"

There was short, nerve-racking pause as L took his time telling his old friend his news.

"She scored a nearly perfect 96% Watari."

Watari froze, staring at the screen.

"L that's…incredible. I have to tell Sadie right away, she'll be so happy to know-"  
"Watari." The monotone voice demanded the man's attention, which he instantly gave.

"No one has ever gotten higher than a 92% on this test. I need to put surveillance camera's in Whammy so I can see the way she works," L started," Also Watari, there is something you must know."

"Yes? What is it?"

"There is a 54 percent chance Sadie is Kira."

* * *

**:O! haha, R&R guys :)**


	6. Chapt 5

**WELL! Fanfiction is being particularly annoying right now, and it is taking an awfully long time to publish this new chapter! DX**

**In other news, I just got my laptop back from a visit to the apple store with a broken charging port T_T and so i finally have a new chapter :D Thank you everyone so much for the reviews, and enjoy the new chapter :)**

* * *

Sadie ran around like a mad woman after her testing. She had wasted so much time, and she hadn't even begun making dinner yet!

Near was sitting on the counter playing with toys silently as other kids were screaming and running around him. Sadie approached him and picked him up, a small, nervous looking smile on her face.

"Hey Near, ready for some dinner? I'm making some mac and cheese, since I started so late today…"

"Why were you in Watari's office?" Near asked, staring right into her eyes.

Sadie simply smiled, shrugging off his attempt at reading her expression, and looked away.

"It's nothing Near. Don't worry about it."

She looked over to the small television screen, noticing a small Japanese reporter in front of it. Below it read subtitles:

_It seems that Kira has struck again ladies and gentlemen._

Sadie's heart pounded strangely, and she placed Near on the floor, completely distracted by the news report in front of her. Who is Kira?

_Yet another three criminals have died due to heart attacks, each of them was convicted of sexual assault years prior._

Suddenly, the same "L" insignia as before appeared on the television, making Sadie's eyes nearly pop out of her skull.

_Luckily, L, the greatest detective known to man, is on the case. L's true identity remains to be hidden, but rest assured, Kira will not terrorize the world for very much longer._

And with that the news report had ended, a commercial about some cleaning product coming on. Sadie stared at the screen for a while, before racing back to Watari's office, leaving Near to stare after her.

Just before Sadie burst through the door to confront Watari, she halted. She could hear the old man's voice speaking to someone, but she could not confirm who. The voice was low, and fairly monotone. It sounded so familiar…

Sadie gasped, realizing it was the same voice that came out of the computer as she was taking the test before!

"L, what makes you say such a ridiculous thing? There is absolutely no way that Sadie is Kira!"

Slowly, the young girl backed away from the door, completely in shock. For a moment, the whole room vibrated to the sound of her heart beat, and Sadie seemed to forget how to breath. _Her…Kira?_ _As in that vile person that just killed three people moments ago?_

Sadie quickly pressed her ear against the door, eager to hear L's reasoning behind this accusation.

"Watari, please calm yourself, and remember that it is still very early in this investigation. I researched the most recent criminal deaths due to a heart attack, and the very first important criminal to die of this cause was living in England, which, of course, is where the Whammy House is located," L paused for a moment before continuing, "His name was Todd Williams, the very same man that murdered Sadie's parents when she was very young."

Sadie's eyes widened, and her heart nearly stopped. Although she did feel slight relief that that man would never, ever leave confinement, she had to admit that L was right. It was all so coincidental…

"L…although this evidence is very sound, how would Sadie ever receive the power to do such a thing? She is constantly working around the Whammy House, and she never-"

"Yes, I am _aware_, Watari, and I am sorry that she is currently my prime suspect. But she just seems too innocent to me-"

"No, L! I thought you were certain that Kira was in Japan!"

"It was merely an educated guess, Watari!" The computer boomed, instantly silencing the old man.

There was a moment, just a small lapse of silence, where Sadie was at a loss as to what to do. Should she…leave? Just upright take her already-packed things and walk out the door? But no, if she left, it would only confirm to L that she is Kira. _Even though I'm not_ Sadie growled in her head.

Her head pounded and her eyebrows scrunched together in concentration. Slowly, steadily, she shook her head and turned away from the door, walking away silently. Her eyes looked distant as she passed Near, no even bothering to acknowledge his curious look. She moved all the way to her room, closing the door shut behind her.

Letting out a sigh, she let a small smirk grace her features. _Well,_ she thought,_ your move, L_.

* * *

**Sorry about its lack-in-length, but i felt this was a appropriate time to stop :) R&R!**


End file.
